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on 28-02-2003 20:58
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Published in : , Poems |
By Novid Shaid
One day, a painful memory shook my heart My old friend had served me since my birth, And I had cast him out onto the street, Denying his undying faithfulness. For my old friend was becoming wearisome, Especially now I'd made new, trendy friends, In these progressing times he seemed passé, My friends would snigger at my companion. So I barged him out onto the lonely street I slammed the door as he began reasoning, I convinced myself he was an inconvenience, I assured my friends I had forsaken him.
Many days and weeks passed gradually, I felt the world vibrating at my feet, His knocking had halted some time ago, But still I knew he lingered there, outside. So I threw off all my guilt and held my breath, Then leapt into the mires of otherness. I plunged in hordes of feigned relationships, I hosted great, extravagant soirees, Fleeting ecstasies were my preoccupation, My house bulged with gatecrashers gushing in, My heart sagged with intruders surging in. Until one day, as I jigged around my room, Encircled by my artificial friends, They closed in on me, stifling my breast, They pressured me to offer them my self, When a slow knock rocked against my door Its reverberation left a thunderous roar, My body trembled like a shaken leaf From deep within arose familiarity, I staggered to and fro, shielding my ears, But still the knocks resounded, thundering. And then the realisation struck me down, My abandoned friend was waiting in the cold. And as this certainty aroused my heart, Tears of shame ran, searing my desires, Each drop fell, sending up my heart in flames, The intruders fled, shrieking in agony. I moved towards the knocking on my door The tense smiles of my friends stood in the way,A ttempting to divert my attention, They promised untold pleasure if I stayed, But when they realised I was intent They grabbed my legs and fought to drag me back They wailed and cried revealing their dismay, And I just kicked them off with bitterness. And so I stood there, facing my front door I turned and saw my friends gaping in horror, I turned the handle with my quivering hand My heart lamented as the door opened, I dreaded facing him after so long, I planned I'd throw myself before his feet, When suddenly every single thing vanished My house, my friends, myself and nothing else remained. And then I found myself not in my room But on the lonely street, there, shivering Before me stood a great, glistening door It opened and my old friend emerged, He covered me with warm, comforting robes He wrapped me in His unifying glow, He sheltered me from sorrow and the cold, And I had been a homeless, wretched soul, And by His love I'd finally returned home. Allah, Most High, says in a Hadith Qudsi that if His servant comes to Him walking, He comes to him running, and so on. Also, He says, Great and Glorious is He, that were the sins of the children of Adam to reach the Heavens, He would still forgive us for our sins if we really meant our repentance. The door of tawba will be open for every single one of us until our last breath. That is a sign of the mercy and forbearance of our true Friend, Allah, The Merciful and Compassionate. And if we do show the courage and honesty in admitting our sins and apologising to our Lord then it isn't because of our own goodness. In reality, it is all by His tawfiq. He was the one who was watching over us in our good times and bad times. He was the one that waited while we forgot Him, disobeyed Him and even slammed the door on Him. When we thought that it was us who had rejected Him and thrown Him out of our lives and then decided to let Him back in, He gave us a sudden shock. It was He, The All Merciful and The Overpowering, who was really letting us back in; we were the ones who had been homeless, who had become wretched and were out in the cold, and it was really His loving gentleness that brought us back home - that let us into the warmth and luminiscence of His presence.
May Allah always encompass us in His mercy, and may He give us all the tawfiq to make tawba until our last breath, and may He make us His close Friends, to whom He gives special attention. Ameen. Last update : 28-02-2003 20:58
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